A Glaring Misprint in Reality

The Last Half Hour of 2006

2006-12-31T23:30:00.000-05:00

Well, it's 11:30 pm on December 31, 2006. The last moments of the year. And what a year it's been!

Not really, but this blog kind of sucks without the fake enthusiasm.

So, in true, television fashion, let's do the year in review:

*ahem*

The year began with the beginning of a relationship. A relationship with alcohol. Also, with Cynthia. She's wonderful. She makes me do a little dance behind closed doors. It's very much one of those reason-to-get-out-of-bed things.

Then a few months of nothing.

In May, my birthday came and went. I don't remember a thing, to be honest. My brother's idea of making sure I always have a drink in my hand blew up in my face. And also into a toilet.

A month later I helped Cynthia move to her grandmother's house, and hurt my back. That lasted a week or two, then I was fine.

Moving on.

A few more months go by and now we're here, December 31st, 11:38 pm.

What a rollercoaster ride of a year. Man! How do I find the time to write to you, my loyal readers? I make the time. Because that's what you mean to me. I love you all, especailly Sven. But seriously, you need to stop sending the love letters. I don't know what a "hårig rygg" is, but I've contacted the proper authorities.

Anyways, that's enough of that. I'm going to go get drunk.

Word.

Choz is bringing the new year in with booze and women. Er... woman. *cough cough*

I heard there's going to be a sequel to Braveheart

2006-10-26T21:41:00.001-04:00

So it is October 26th and I figured I should start writing more often. Once again, I'll try to do this like once a week or something. But I'll inevitably get sidetracked by a new movie or game, or something shiny by the side of the road.

This week was fairly uneventful, although I am going to an evening of murder tomorrow. Should be fun, as long as it doesn't turn into one of those teen slasher movies, where somebody actually IS killing us all off, and then you find out it was some obscure character you saw in the background that one time during the introduction. Like the mailman or something.

He's secretly in love with the host, and if he can't have her NOBODY CAN.

If I add some indentation, a little dialogue and a sex scene or two, I've got myself a guaranteed blockbuster right there.

But I digress (from not a whole lot)

I want to get serious for a moment. I want everyone to know something, and it may seem a bit weird to say, but I figure, the internet is for expressing oneself, and, being oneself myself, I'll do that.

I just want people to know that, despite the fact that I don't get to see my friends very often anymore, that I don't have time to hang out every weekend, I think about them all very often. I wish I had more hours in the day to see you all, but I don't. I'm trying to get my life back in order and that's taking a lot longer than anticipated, so I just want to thank you all for being patient with me and know that one day I'll have more than a few bucks in my pocket and more time and we can all go out for dinner and a drink.

I'd list you, but you know who you are. Some of you have links on the right there. Some of you don't. Doesn't matter.

Just keep that patience up, alright?

I need to go relax now. Thanks for listening.

Now get back to work, you ingrates.

/Choz pops like he weasel.

I heard there's going to be a sequel to Braveheart

2006-10-26T21:41:00.000-04:00

If I was pregnant, I'd be giving birth today

2006-10-18T01:32:00.000-04:00

Yes, that's right, ladies and gentleman. Yes. Man.

Today, or yesterday, actually, is/was my 9 month "anniversary" to my loverly girlfriend, Cynthia.

I felt writing today would be a good idea, one because I don't write a lot, but two, and most importantly, I want people to know. I want people to know that I love her very much.

This is my rooftop, and I am yelling the news.

In other news, there is no other news, except that I want you all to check out HER blog, on the right there, because she's awesome and if you don't have the pleasure of knowing her, maybe that'll help you. Also, I want people to see that she's a great writer and to tell her so. She doesn't believe me, so get to the commentation.

Do it for The Choz.

Anyhoo, that's all, really.

/Choz is... ah, whatever.

Titles Galore!

2006-10-10T04:18:00.000-04:00

So I enabled titles. I dunno if they're gonna work or not. Last time I tried them, they whacked everything on my page.

We'll see how it goes.

Also, I've fond a new, easier way of keeping an online album of my photography and stuff. I've changed the URL on the right there, if you care to check 'er out.

Okay, it's 4:15 in the morning. I need sleep.

/My eyes! The Chozzles do nothing!

2006-10-10T00:41:00.000-04:00

Eight months!

Eight months, and you all thought I was dead.

You didn't even call to see if I was okay! You just made the assumption and moved on. You're so... ugh, I can't even look at you right now.

Haha, see how I turned that from me being lazy to you being a jerk?

So... eight months.

Wow.

The big eight... uh... well, I was gonna say eight-zero, but that's not right at all.

The big zero-eight.

What has been going on in the passed (past?) eight months? Well, in a nutshell:

I quit my shitty phone job again, lounged for about two months, worked as a short order cook in a kitchen, was told I had a really swell, great paying job, quit the restaurant, got screwed for the swell, great paying job, hung around for another month, and got a job at Toys R Us, where I am currently employed.

And also, the biggest and most importantest of all, I am still, yes still, in a committed, loving relationship with a girl I never thought I'd find. But I did. And she makes me do little dances when nobody's looking.

I think that's a pretty good measure of how much you love and care about a person. The kind of strange little dances you do when you're alone and thinking about them.

This is how I measure things.

When I make a cake, everything is measured in "tires". You take a tire, no rim, and fill the hollow part with the ingredient. That's "one tire".

The cakes always turn out to be the size of a small condo. I dunno why.

The local homeless people love it. It's like Christmas. Cake Christmas.

Well, that's enough blathering for me. I need to go... uh.. stop blogging now. I'm kind of annoyed that you're still here actually. You're like one of those guests who won't leave after dinner, but you want to go to bed, but you can't, because this guy is just fucking sitting there watching TV.

A'ight. That's it fo' me, dudes. I'm out.

Peace.

/Choz floats like a butterfly, but stings like a scrape after falling off your bike.

2006-02-03T21:46:00.000-05:00

Well, here's a quicky from the great beyond!!! Not really, but it's through email, so hopefully this will work.

On to the post!

So it turns out somebody at my work started a blog and stumbled onto mine, so a big hello to Andre! Say hello, class.

SAY IT!!!!

His blog is at http://relayheaven.blogspot.com and it's always a pleasure to read anything he writes. He's eloquent liek Steinbeck. Yeah, THE Billy-Joe Steinbeck of the Ohio Farmer's Report. I don't think I can lay more praise at your feet, Andre.

Anyways, now that that is out of the way, I'd just like to make the official announcement that I am now in a committed relationship. Sorry, Helga. You need to move on. Seriously. The gifts are freaking me out.

But all joking aside, it's been like, the best 2 1/2 weeks that I can remember. She's a doll, she is. :)

You'll all meet her eventually. Who knows? Maybe I'll have her make a post so you can meet her first hand. Through the internet.

It's a crazy technology.

Anyways, I need to get back to what I was doing. I just felt a need for some updating.

/Choz likes spare ribs.

2006-01-15T22:00:00.000-05:00

Up? Or down? Who knows? Not me. This was taken a long time ago.

So here's a new post for all my friends. This is more or less a test of my ability to upload images to my blog. I'm just testing out the waters, so to speak. I have my own URL now, www.welovethebomb.com, but I have not gotten any blogging software together up there. I will get it done though, so all this is kind of futile, really.

Anyways, moving on...

Things are moving and shaking these days. My employers have officially pissed me off for the last time. I'm out of there as soon as my (now infamous) car is running. I'll take a job at a Blockbuster or something if I have to. This is how much I hate my workplace.

If it weren't for all the friends I've made there, I'd have fire bombed that place a long time ago. Metaphorically, of course. I don't need somebody I know calling the cops on me for plotting to wipe out a city block.

The personal life may be picking up again, after a too-long hiatus ("hiatus" is a good word, and no, I won't tell you how long it's been) I've met a wonderful young lady whom I am presently courting. Haha, I've never said I was "courting" anyone.

I'm gonna get beat up.

Anyhoos, that's about it. Work sucks, girl's cute and interesting and fun and lots of other things.

Oh, and I'm like 90% sure school is on my very near horizon. Yay?

/Choz out. Like a boy in the village.

2005-12-17T04:36:00.000-05:00

Well, it's 4:36 on a Friday night and I spent it doing nothing. Those of you in Montreal will know it was a helluva day for snow today. I didn't go to work. Fucking buses, man...

When I want to go to work I can't...

Anyways, things have been moving slowly at the new ranch (ie website, I just wish I had a ranch) but they'll pick up once I get off my ass. I figure I can keep posting here until something comes of it.

Just thought I'd jot down some thoughts since I'm wide awake.

I've recently realized that life is really quite strange. Not messed up the way I normally think it is, just strange. It has a strange way of telling you things. And even then, it says it in a language that resembles a French person speaking Polynesian with a thick Italian accent. Also, this French person is from Mars, and can't really speak any of these languages.

I've been getting a lot of messages from life in general these days and I spend my waking moments deciphering things I deem small clues, while probably missing planes flying overhead with message banners for me.

But one thing is certain, I am pretty content right now. I mean, things can always be better, but these days I'm thinking "Ehn, this is nice." Good friends, good family, good drink, good food... I can't ask for much more, really. Except money. Send me money.

But I digress (often)

This is just to say that despite how you think life is going, it's probably not, whether that be for the better or worse, I don't know. Learn to look at what you've got, not what you wish you had. You might realize you've got more than you thought.

How prolific. Or something. I don't know what prolific means.

Alright, well, that's my babbling for this evening. I aplogize to you, my friend, if this made no sense whatsoever. It's 4:44 now, and I've got my guitar on my lap and a page full of handwritten nonsense in front of me. What can I say?

2005-10-26T23:33:00.000-04:00

This is yet another test to see if I fucked up my blog.

Soon enough, this will become an archive of sorts, as I've registered a domain name and plan on turning that into my permablog.

New and improved blog, here I come!

More news as we get it.

2005-10-24T02:32:00.000-04:00

Well, a good update today!

Let me take you back, my friends. Back to a time of innocence. A time of homework and firecrackers after dark in the playground.

During these glorious times, my family and I, we had some neighbours. These neighbours moved in after us, and soon became close friends and our families enjoyed many a good time.

Then one day, tragedy struck. The father of said family, to be further known as Erik, got transferred to the US for work.

We tried our best to keep in touch, but as these things go, we drifted apart and lost contact.

The subject of tracking down our old friends came up many a time over the 7 or so years since contact was lost, but any and all attempts proved fruitless.

Hard times begun. Our old friends were nowhere to be found. The infamous and tragic 9/11 came and went and we had no word. My mother feared something had potentially happened. I thought nothing of it, because as most of you know, Tennessee and New York, well, they aren't very close to each other.

My mother can be a stubborn woman, God love her.

Then a few weeks ago, my sister and her friends were being silly and the subject of our old friends came up. I declared by the end of the evening that I would track them down. 10 minutes later, with the help of my other good friend, Google, I had found Erik's email address.

After much debate my father emailed him, and by God, it WAS him. Contact had been re-established! Good times!

So we now have been exchanging emails with them and I feel pretty good about all of it. My mother (and all of us) loved them very much and we (especially my mother) were heartbroken when contact was lost.

I feel a major milestone in our lives has been hit.

2005-10-22T14:26:00.000-04:00

This is my once-again testing of blogging by email. This might make life a bit easier, as I'll be able to blog from anywhere. Even though I doubt it will work.

[EDIT: It worked!]

2005-10-21T00:23:00.000-04:00

Alright, an update for our good friends at Shop-N-Glo; "The place where radioactive mutation is our gift to you."

And now, back to your regularly scheduled program.

Here's what's been going down in my life and times. Not a whole lot, like usual, but what do you expect from somebody who spends every waking moment at work? Cut me some slack!

Aside from work, I've been doing some recording. Finally got a mini-pseudo home studio going on, so I'm dropping tracks like... um... MC Hammer? Look, that's beside the point. The point being that I've finally got a way of getting some of my riffs recorded, so who knows? Maybe one day I'll have a really mediocre album to sell to all of you.

And other than recording, I've been slowly falling for a girl whom I don't know will reciprocate. Did I spell that right? Whatever. Story of my life, huh? Every few months we've got a post like his, so what makes this one different? I don't know, but she is. Different in the best possible way. Like when you first tried white chocolate.

I'll keep you all updated as information is available. I'm just not sure what I'm feeling these days. Or, well, that's not true. For the first time in a long while, I'm sure of how I feel, but like always, not sure how she does. There are extenuating circumstances though, so it's made life a bit more difficult.

I'm constantly a victim of circumstance.

Well, that's that. My updated life. Do a little prayer for me that this one works out, because I've got a good feeling about her.

/Choz is feeling fuzzy inside. Right below the diaphragm.

2005-09-30T00:31:00.000-04:00

1 month 2 days.

I think that might be a personal best.

Um... lemme see here, not a whole lot going on these days. Working better shifts now. Only a few more crappy shifts, so life might be able to get a little more organized.

Or not. What do I know?

Also some things are a-brewin' in life, but I'm not talking about it yet. The whole jinxing it thing. You understand, right? UNDERSTAND IT!!!

On another note; Clone High, one of the single greatest cartoons ever to be pulled out of the insane skull of some brilliant maniac, is now on DVD. I urge you all to go check it out. And by urge, I mean demand. I'm holding your families hostage.

You have 24 hours.

Well, 22.

Because I said so.

Alright, well, aside from all that, finances are getting a bit organized, slowly but surely. I'll be getting my home studio up and running in no time! Whoo!

Then you'll all be bombarded with my screeching into a microphone. I ARE MUSICIAN!!

Alright, I'm fucking tired, as you can tell. Gnight y'all.

/Choz is dead. Send him money as a gift.

2005-08-27T13:49:00.000-04:00

Almost 3 weeks without a post, you say?

Well, today's your lucky day!

A quick one before I'm off to work.

I moved back into my parents' basement a few days ago so I can get my finances back in order. It's nice. Having he whole basement after being stuck in that tiny room for a few years is craziness. I have room to walk. Whoda thunk it?

Not I.

That's about all I've got in the "new stuff" department, so I'll leave you with this here...

*ahem*

Yoink!

/Choz runs off to work.

2005-08-09T21:00:00.000-04:00

Rest in peace, old friend.

2005-08-02T15:58:00.000-04:00

Hello, one and all. This is a post for 2 reasons.

1 - It's about time I do one

2 - I am here to tell you about a website. I was definitely not asked to plug it. Definitely not. It is of my own accord. I'm not sure why though, as the 3 of you that read this don't listen to me anyway. If you did, you'd all have those life-size-Jay-tattoos on your backs now. Ingrates.

Anyways, let's do this in order. First of all, speaking of life-sized tattoos, I got one. Well, a tattoo anyway. I don't really like anything life-sized, especially people, so I'm not doing that. It's just a tribal-type thingamajigger on my shoulder. Maybe one day you'll get a chance to see it. If I'm feeling naughty.

Segue.

Go out and check out Boolistic. A friend of mine runs the thing at work, and it's a dandy little whatsajigger. And if I say it's dandy, you damn well better believe it's spectacular. Like a flock of Eagles, flying into the sunset, carrying coconuts to distant lands who know not of these strange and delicious nuts.

Yeah, I said "delicious nuts" and I'm sticking to it.

Bonus points to anybody who catches my (extremely) vague reference to a great and hilarious movie. Except Fig, who will catch it even if there aren't points involved.

All joking aside though, it is a pretty neat little search engine. Now all they need to do is put a way to search for stuff on eBay on there...

Umm... alright, well, that's about it. The new job is wearing me down quickly. The whole 5am thing, while nice to be done my day at 3pm, is destroying me. No, wait, it's obliterating me. That's a WAY cooler word.

/Choz must go to bed sleep time goodnight now.

2005-07-11T22:07:00.000-04:00

Alright, an update! Whoo!

Here it comes!

Did you catch it? If not, let me recap the epic post that reduces the very greatest of men to mere husks of their former selves.

Intense.

Alright, well, enough of that ridiculousness.

First things first; the mohawk is gone already. I had it for a few weeks, and it was so much maintenance, I just gave up. Maybe one day, when I'm feeling saucy, I'll redo it. As for now, my head is shaved. And it's the best ever. Except for the whole sun thing. My scalp has no direct-sun experience, so it's suffering a bit.

Ah well, moving on...

Um... I got a new job. I just had my first day today, so I'll let you all know in a few months how it's going. (In my next post, obviously.) I've gone from a boring call centre job where if it weren't for my (former) co-workers, I'd probably have hung myself, to a nice factory job, where I'm moving around and actually physically working. I gotta say, my day FLEW by. But I'm exhausted. I'm up at 5am every morning from now on, but I'm done my day at 3pm, so that's pretty sweet. Hell, I did an hour of overtime and I still left earlier than most people. Hah!

Take that Space Coyote!

Er...

Uh...

Oh yeah, the car is still not in my possession, but it looks like Wednesday (July 13th) is the day I'm getting it. I've been saying it for weeks, and it keeps getting pushed back, so I'm not getting my hopes up.

Let's see, anything else...?

Oh, I went to see "Up and Down" with a good friend of mine. It's a Czech movie, and it's quite good. Although the subtitles made me miss a few visual moments. Dammit! Oh well, I'd recommend it to anybody who's not afraid of subtitles. I know some of you are, but it's okay, you're not stupid or anything. *cough*

Hey, look at that!

Jumping around from subject to subject, keeping them a paragraph or under is fun. It's my Blog, and I'll write however I want.

I like robots. If you ever want to buy me a present, this would be the one to get. Look at him! He has lightning bolt radar! And some type of Arkanoid/Pong thing on his chest.

Man, that guy is so cool.

Alright, this is just getting ridiculous in length. I said it was a recap, not a retelling. Jeez.

/Choz has lightning-radar stealth technology.

2005-05-26T15:09:00.000-04:00

Alright, well, it's been a long time here. I apologize to our reader for the delay; sorry about that, Steve.

Unfortunately not much has been happening, so that's the reason for the delay. I guess I can come out and talk about my last post, since some people know, some don't and the rest are furrowing their brows at the carpet.

It's just a carpet, guys. Move on.

Anyhoos, on to the updates!

The big news? Well, I'm planning on going back to school. Not such big news right? People do it all the time, but here's the catch; I'm going to school... ON THE MOON!!! Well, not really, but I may as well be, as the real plan is to go to Europe. Get off this mountainous landscape we call North America. I don't even know what the last 6 words in that sentence really means, but whatever.

So yeah. Europe.

A little bit of the Olde Worlde. (Adding an "e" to the end makes it olde skool. Also spelling things wrong.)

But first, there will be at least 2 or 3 years of getting my finances in order so I can travel unhindered by the overpowering daemon of debt.

And that's my segue into my next piece of information;

I'm very close to buying my first car. Scary and awesome all at once. It will cut my traveling time to work from 1 1/2 hours down to about 20 minutes. It will also allow me to actually do things, without having to rely on my friends for a ride, or borrowing my parents' car. One more step to complete independence (known in some circles as "responsibility".)

Well, lemme see. Not much has been going on. As mentioned here it was my birthday about a week ago, give or take a few days. I'd like to thank Hidden Nook for mentioning it. I have no idea who or what you are, but I'm picturing a hairy mole like creature, 8 feet tall and decorated head to toe in tribal tattoos and piercings.

Oh, hold on, I need to take my pills.

Oh, and Mel's living in Montreal now! Everybody give her a hug and money, because she can't work.

She dances if you hold out long enough. I swear.

Wow. Big update. Whaddya know? Lots of linkies, lots of hidden DVD-like easter eggs, lots of suspense and mystery. Maybe my best post yet.

Aside from that one about the farting zombie. Man, how did he DO that with no body functions?

[EDIT: I forgot to mention, I got a mohawk. I'll be updating my profile picture thingy as soon as an appropriate picture, one not involving my ass, becomes available.]

[EDIT (take 2): Picture updated.]

/Choz is up, up, and awaaaaaaay!

2005-03-30T12:37:00.000-05:00

A slow realization creeped upon me today, while laying in bed relaxating. I'm not going to get into it with anybody just yet, as I'm not sure wha it entirely entails, but it does involve a drastic change in career.

Let's just say it's something I always wanted to do, but never really thought about actually attempting to do it. (Kind of like "Astronaut" for most people.)

Anyhoo, more updates eventually. No, you can't ask me personally about it, this is something I want to figure out on my own here. Or maybe I'll talk to one person, it'll be like Russian Roulette. Who gets to know? WHO KNOWS???

On to other news, I'm still feeling a bit shitty, but I got to spend an evening with one of my favourite people in the whole world yesterday, and it definitely brought my spirits up.

/Choz out

2005-03-27T22:46:00.000-05:00

I don't even know what to think anymore.

I don't know where I stand with anything anymore. I feel like an outsider wherever I go, and I don't know why.

I find myself constantly asking myself if I actually have any friends, or is my life just a big practical joke? Do people just snicker about me when I leave the room?

That's not entirely true, actually. There are a few people I know are my friends, but very few. These are the people I see the least, unfortunately. Conflicting schedules and all.

I feel like I'm losing my grip on reality these days. I'm stressed out to the point that I've had a tension headache for 3 days. I can't even sleep, my head pounds so hard. I need to take painkillers just to get some rest so I can be "productive" at work.

Melodramatic? Probably.

Actually happening? Definitely.

I need to reorganize. Get out of the city. I need to change things. A new job. A new city, maybe.

New life?

Who knows.

There's just one thing I need to do to get the ball rolling, and it's proving more difficult than I'd like it to be. I need to speak to somebody and it's just not happening, on my side for one, because I'm a big shit, and because our schedules don't line up very well.

Time is my biggest problem it would seem. Not really a lack thereof, just that it never lines up properly with what I need to do.

Fuck.

Everybody say "fuck" for me, in a nice annoyed tone. Scream it if you have to. Get it out. You know you want to. Everybody else is doing it, so why can't you?

FUCK.

/choz needs an Advil.

2005-03-20T22:02:00.000-05:00

So close, yet so very far! Why does the Universe do this to me constantly? *sigh*

Oh well, not giving up. Not yet. I can't. Not this time.

/Choz is bummed and going to do something else.

2005-03-19T01:35:00.000-05:00

Oh, on a more serious note, I'd like to extend my congratulattions to Melly on her acceptance to the local palace of edumacation, Concordia University. Congrats to you.

Drinks all around! Send the bill to Fig!

Other than that, I guess I can do a real update, here. Lemme see...

Um, well, things on all fronts are pretty decent. I will be finding out soon about certain things that will change other things a pretty substantial amount. Those who know, understand, those who don't, well, too bad. If it works out, I'm sure you'll find out. If not, I'm sure you will anyway.

Man, I wish I could get paid for being vague.

Hrm, what else? Oh Fig and Melly are looking at apartments (mentioned in Fig's blog recently. READ IT.) and that's kind of mind-blowing. I'd just assumed Fig was gonna live at his parent's place forever. :)

Been reading the Hitch Hiker's Guide trilogy (in 5 parts), and I must say, I can't believe it's taken me this long to read them. They're bloody brilliant. The amount of everyday references seen like, everywhere, is humbling. I thought I was in the loop before, but honestly, I had no idea.

I can now say that the Hitch Hicker's Guide movie is my most anticipated movie of the year, even moreso than Star Wars Episode 3 (which has the potential to redeem the prequels, but won't. I've learned my lesson of getting my hopes up.)

Oh, and I recently saw the remake of Dawn of the Dead finally. Pretty intense.

And I watched Shaun of the Dead again tonight. I'll repeat from my post when I first saw it; you need to see it if you haven't. And if you have, see it again.

/choz needs to start saying "bollocks" more often.

2005-03-19T00:56:00.001-05:00

Wellity wellity well...

My pirate name is:

Iron Sam Kidd

A pirate's life isn't easy; it takes a tough person. That's okay with you, though, since you a tough person. Even though you're not always the traditional swaggering gallant, your steadiness and planning make you a fine, reliable pirate. Arr!

Get your own pirate name from fidius.org.

This quiz is obviously a farce, as I'm Captain Winthrop Tanglebeard of the Sea Donkey!

I'd also like to think of myself as more of a swaggering gallant than most. I'm like frigging Zaphod Beeblebrox, I'm so swaggeringly gallant.

YAAAAR!!!

2005-03-13T22:33:00.000-05:00

I've been trying to get remote blogging to work on here and I can't. Why does the internet hate me so? Godamn.

/choz